Categories


  • Health
  • Others
  • Photography

  •  

     

    Our Popular Articles

    RSS feed

    Gay Life in India

    Narrating a Gay's Life in India

    Posted on 3/16/2008

    Five years ago, the opportunity to quit London and move to Mumbai in the interests of my work presented itself. Various quirky charms of this city was quite unknown to me. As some sensible person would do, I went around asking people what they thought of the matter.

    Only in my case, they were some people who knew I was then a gay lad of 21, so there had to be some special considerations.

    No one said it was bad. They all said it was far different from the gay scene I had known in England since my pre-pubescent days. I didn’t understand but I was sure I would have a lot of fun in Mumbai – a city of more than 6 million, practically ruled by men - as a young well-off entrepreneur. That was all set to be changed.

    Here’s what I found out about the gay scene in Mumbai. I should have known most people I asked were being awfully English when saying ‘different’ for ‘drastically damnable’.

    There isn’t a gay scene in Mumbai neither in Delhi.

    There are hundreds of thousands of gay people here but if you did a survey, you would think it was a curiously homogeneously heterosexual city. There are some rather strange straight people in Mumbai who pretend to be gay on some days of the week, particularly when the wife is not being too obliging.

    There is no gay scene in Mumbai because you can’t tell anyone that you’re gay – even though it does not constitute a crime, not even under the bizarre load of bull euphemistically called the legal system. If you tell your neighbors what you are, they’d probably never speak to you again and avoid you if they have the chance. If you tell your co-employees, they’d think you’re the assault-in-the-office-loo type. If you tell the social services, - but I ramble now, what social services?

    I don’t deny there are some organizations in India, particularly in Delhi which claim to do social work for the homo cause. More often than not, they are like political parties with one person at the helm of affairs, the affair usually being all about his great charm to impress the media every now and then.

    There are gay people everywhere, just as there are straight people. My friend says it just doesn’t work out if you admit as much anywhere between Istanbul and Bangkok. I’ve observed this to be so true. You may have had bed breaking sex with a man in Mumbai, but four minutes after ejaculation, he would deny knowing you. Or worse, he would kill you for being an immoral person too rich for the good of his nation. This I will try and explain to myself in view of the fact that 76% of the Indian populace lives on just about 20 rupees a day (£1 = 80 rupees, roughly).

    It isn’t like this is not a ‘modern’ city or country. Mumbai and Delhi are progressive cities, after all. Could gay bars and gay nightlife places are all that difficult to run? Well, Mumbai faring only slightly better, I can say of Delhi that the gay bars here should immediately close down. They do more damage to the non-existent scene than one could ever imagine.

    Maybe it’s that 20 rupees thing again, but most of the urban unemployed/underemployed male seems to have realized that there is a niche market for their bodies here, irrespective of sexual orientation, served on a nightly basis. You’d only ever find rent boys in the gay bars and not in night walks. The term ‘escort’ is far too dignified to be applied to the version available in Mumbai and Delhi. Again, there are bars everywhere, but where’s the good one?

    I can safely declare India as a hellhole for anyone who happens to be gay and looking for the finer things in life. I’m glad I have the choice to go back, and that I’ve lived to tell the tale to others.

    How to Work Well with Different Generations of People >>

    << Tips for Growing Healthy Hair

     

    COMMENT

    Name: Gregg G Hahnns

    I am an American starving for information as it would relate to the Indian culture. I dated an Indian (college student) in my home city for almost 2 years. I often ask about the gay culture in his country and receive answers similar to that of the author. Though I believe most Indians are ready to move forward, your culture is bound by thousands of years of tradition. The acceptance of gay lifestyles won't happen overnight. It doesn't matter if its legal. Like the U.S., when you are told from a young age that homosexuality is wrong, how can you expect the full grown adult to embrace it? Acceptance starts at the bottom, not at the government level. I don't need the gov't to tell me being gay is alright. Indian parents (and American alike) should let their children make their own choices associated with their sexuality. Stop telling them at young impressionable ages that gays are abnormal. Teachers, protect your students whom are verbally and physically abused because of their sexual identity. I suppose one would need to step away from traddition to do what is right!

    Name: tJ

    I am gay. I am Indian, from Delhi. See the name i have displayed? I hate to be anonymous or giving a name like that for saying what i totally believe in. The gay scene sucks in India. I am 23 and i know, i will never get to see India as a friendly place for gays, at least not till i am alive. It's f**king suffocating. Traditions are the last thing i care about. My friends know about me, and most of them are with me. I am single. And i don't see any scope of finding myself someone out here. Anyways, just wanted to share how it is in India with the day scene. And yeah, if people come to know you are gay, they will do anything to f**k you up and make your living horrible. Yeah it happened with me during graduation. Trust me, those f**kin 4 years are one of the worst parts of my life. I wonder when people out here will actually start respecting each other.

    Name: boby

    well friends i am 23 year gay . all the time i am very confuse about my sex .from my childhood i am attracted towards the male but i cant tell any one that i am a gay . i dont understand why people hate the gay .we are also human being. we have our emotions. since i come from small town it is very difficult for me 2 reveal this turth .hopefully i am waiting for the day when indian government will pass aye rule 4 us.

    Name: VIVEK

    Hi! I am 22 years old . love to be what i am. i have seen people who hide themselves being GAYS.. but i dont care. my opinion is that you should be boss of your life. one should feel complex coz its not something which is bad however we are lucky people i guess.. nevertheless i dont understand y this world dont understand.. "i dont care a guy kissing a girl in the middle of the road", but GUYS walking with hand and hand are called gays..." the real fact is that this intimacy is not something which is developed overnight .. but its something which is innate... i know i am a born GAY,,coz when i was a kid my attraction was towards GUYS may be not in that sense but i used to look at guys and the same kept on going now i realise that i am a GAY and proud to be, live your life.. love your friends.. respect your family and dont give DAMMM!! to the people who talk fishy for you....

    Name: Subhankar Zac

    India is the purest form of hate and prejudice. Its a countru where Dowry is common in 95% of the societies, girl child killings also occur in many places. Inter-religious n inter-cast marriages are frowned upon. Hindus do not have any specific reason nor traditions to blame. Indians are bound to ther hate! They need someone to put their hate on. India is country of sin. A country where idol worship is common, which is a sin n punished by death. But no condemnation of homosexuality. Yet, they need something to put their hate on. Indians also blame the West for every single thing. N blame the British more for for their rule in India, but when it comes to condemning gay people, They have no grudge. British rule in India brought the anti-gay law in India, n today UK is one of the progressive countries for gay people. India has no 1 to blame but itself.Its a place whos existence itself is an abomination.

    Name: sam

    gay life!!! who say its a life. yeah sure its alife of a man living alone inside from heart ..having depression and frustation on what ..who m i ? i curse myself why i am gay ? but i know its not change my sexual orientaion ! there is no life of gay they live a extremeley secret and discreet life. being gay i want a nice guy to whom i live together all through my life with some adopted child forever but its quite not possible.........if u find some gay men just they want to eliminate their sexual frustation and then byee ....i am just tired of those peoples.leave the society plzz gay guyzz make change in yourself we will hange the society.....we only have to show some ignition ..........i dont know where my gonna end ..... better try to be straight......i guess

    Name: Nobby

    It might not be the most ideal solution, but finding a better life in a different place would probably seem a great option compared to staying in a crap place...

    Name: chanku

    yes, there are lakhs of indians like gaysex/homosex they all opressing it in them as the society do not allow to be alive if openly come out. many are there like to do gay sex and enjoying it very secretly after marriage also.

    Name: sami

    Being a gay especially in my country is a big curse. I 'm 19 and belongs to a fully traditional village of a part of this country. From the age of my puberty when i came to know what i 'm till now, there was not a second in my life to make any reason to be happy. I don't know what my future is, i don't know a single most person in whom i could confide. The worst is the irony of my destiny that i can't even share my bitter truth with my parents. They would never even understand what a GAY actually means. Sometimes it seems like there is no one who cares about me. but i know i have to live because i have not enough courage to commit suicide. What i have experienced from the life is that for gay people,,,, Nothing lasts and people change, love is hard and life is strange.

    Name: Daniel

    Oh, guys, it seems to be horrible being a gay in India. But, following the szatistic numbers, there must be about 700 milions gay people in India! You have a big power to change the things! You have a big politic power. They need your money, your taxes - your ping money, your ping taxes! They need your votes in elections! Just dont be scared! Make your comming-outs. First to your families! Dont be scared to do that. Parents will always love their children, doest matter the sexual orientation. Just dont be affraid! If your parents dont accept your orientation they are not real loving parents, then leave them. Vote only the politics who has a program to help you, tóchange your life. Dont vote the homophobs! Contact your GL activist and groups, make a big stream of revolte. If you will be only complaining and nothing doing your country and and your life will never change. Íwish you the best, Indian gay boys and girls!

    Name: sagar

    nothing will change in india, we will never live openly here....we are free to move here and there but from inside we are imprisonment....we are not able to get the natural happiness which is required for every1 to live happily....

    *Name:
    *Email:
    *Comment:
    *Code: Please enter the sum of 5+2